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Tue, Apr. 10th, 2007, 08:21 am

Mmm, I feel like a little ham myself!

From Tug of War! by S:

"On Logan's balls, Jake's tongue felt like ham."

Is this a typo? An obscure idiom? I'm at a loss here.

I was initially at a loss a couple lines later with:

"Jake slurped Logan's testicles as if devouring kenepas."

but Google tells me kenepas is a green plum-like tropical fruit. Well allrighty then.

Tue, Apr. 10th, 2007 12:32 pm (UTC)

Maybe it's part of the American Pie school of thought where all tactile experience must be related to food products?

Tue, Apr. 10th, 2007 12:48 pm (UTC)

But what distinguishes the Ham school of fellatio? If I had to rank the blowjobs I've gotten by how much they felt like ham, I'd be entirely at a loss.

Wed, Apr. 11th, 2007 05:08 pm (UTC)

I truly hope that no man ever makes that comparison in my presence! lol

Tue, Apr. 10th, 2007 01:18 pm (UTC)

Someone was hungry...

And I hope none of the BJs I've given have felt like ham!

Tue, Apr. 10th, 2007 03:11 pm (UTC)


Tue, Apr. 10th, 2007 04:08 pm (UTC)

That’s just funny. I find myself strongly compelled to respond with silly puns.

Wed, Apr. 11th, 2007 05:00 pm (UTC)

Looks like you're not the only one. (see below)

Tue, Apr. 10th, 2007 05:20 pm (UTC)

Mmm, I feel like a little ham myself!

Actually, you're big, big ham.

Tue, Apr. 10th, 2007 08:42 pm (UTC)

What worries me is how he knew what ham felt like against his balls.

But reading swiftly through a page or two of that, it's riddled with horrid imagery, like someone lifting their arms horizontally into a v shape!!!

Wed, Apr. 11th, 2007 05:07 pm (UTC)

I did notice after posting that S's prose seems to get weirder the longer I look at it. The very next line in the story after the ham bit is: "Fuckin' A!" Logan grunted. Uncontrollably, he twisted left, and his pubes bristled like the leaves on the trees outside the panel window. which is less colorful, but similarly opaque.

A couple lines later, we get "Unfucking believable!" Logan heaved, pulling Jake's hair as though it were
a ragged doll.

As if his hair were a ragged doll? Wow.

Wed, Apr. 11th, 2007 07:22 am (UTC)

Heh heh.

Wed, Apr. 11th, 2007 07:24 am (UTC)

Somehow I keep reading it as 'the tongue felt like ham'- as in the tongue felt happy, sad, felt silly; felt like ham. Makes one wonder what ham feels like, emotionally? ;p

Wed, Apr. 11th, 2007 05:03 pm (UTC)

Eager for attention?

Nah, I guess that's how a ham feels.

I put a minute or so into trying to come up with some sort of 'curing homosexuality' pun, but it's not quite coming together.