Wed, Feb. 15th, 2006, 09:14 pm

Facts of female anatomy for the male sex story writer

I've been reading online smut for over a decade now, and I've seen some remarkable anatomical misapprehensions in my day. I've decided to address a few of them for the record. Feel free to suggest stuff I should add.

Bra Sizing:


If a bra is sized at, say, 34C, only the letter describes the cup size. The wearer of that bra (if it fits) is a C cup. The number describes the circumference of her ribcage just below her breasts. Thus your 44DD-wearing ingenue has a 44 inch chest excluding her breasts.. Not that there's anything wrong with that, you understand. I just thought you should know.

Nipples:


Men who don't understand how nipples work remind me of the substantial percentage of the population that believes that the moon is never visible during the day. They've managed to preserve illusions while the facts were staring them in the face. Here, try a little experiment for me. Go get an ice cube, pull your shirt up under your arms, and rub the ice on one of your nipples.

Go ahead--try it. I won't tell anyone you did it.

You will probably notice the following phenomena:

1) The nipple gets firmer and more prominent. It increases little or not at all in volume.

2) The areole (that's the dark surrounding skin, and, yeah, I had to check the spelling) shrinks, roughens, and darkens a little.

3) You don't immediately get wildly turned on (It's okay if you do; you're just kind of atypical)

Congratulations! You have now acquired some important and useful nipple data--To wit: 1) and 2) demonstrate that, although 'erect' and 'swollen' are reasonable synonyms with regard to cocks, they are not the same thing in describing nipples; and 3) demonstrates that nipple erection is independent of sexual arousal. You can be turned-on and not have erect nipples and you can have erect nipples and not be turned on.

Also, I'm trying to stick to anatomy and not delve into issues of style here, but unless you have an actual office supply fetish (not that there 's anything wrong with that if you do), could you please avoid the 'pencil erasers' analogy? I'm really tired of it.

The Cervix:


A penis (or anything else approaching that size) penetrating a cervix is very, very unlikely, and guaranteed to be very, very unpleasant for the woman. There's more to be said on that topic, but that's the main point.

Female Ejaculation:


I'm gonna tread lightly on this one, cause there's still a surprising amount of controversy on the topic. Female ejaculate is thin and generally clear. There is no necessary correlation between female ejaculation and orgasm. That is to say, most women who can ejaculate can also come without ejaculating, and some can ejaculate without coming.

Vaginal Tightness.


Cunts are not "worn out" or "used up" by frequent sex. Vaginal tightness is controlled by muscles. Exercise makes muscles stronger. If you jerk off a lot, does it make your hand unable to squeeze your dick?

Wed, Feb. 15th, 2006 06:51 pm (UTC)
sagittaria

As a possessor of female anatomy, I thank you for your public service.

Wed, Feb. 15th, 2006 06:53 pm (UTC)
vinnie_tesla

As an ardent fan of female anatomy, I remain dedicated to continuing my research into the topic.

Wed, Feb. 15th, 2006 07:05 pm (UTC)
mycrust

A penis (or anything else approaching that size) penetrating a cervix is very, very unlikely

Well except for, y'know, babies. But I really don't think that's what these authors have in mind.

Wed, Feb. 15th, 2006 07:06 pm (UTC)
vinnie_tesla

I could clarify with "from the outside"...

Wed, Feb. 15th, 2006 08:01 pm (UTC)
anotherjen

Yeah, I guess a penis could penetrate a cervix if the woman were in labor, but it's probably not a good idea medically, and one would have a hard time finding someone who was up for that.

Wed, Feb. 15th, 2006 08:34 pm (UTC)
mycrust

No! Stop! Don't say that or someone will start writing smutty stories about just such a scenario!

Wed, Feb. 15th, 2006 09:27 pm (UTC)
anotherjen

You mean they haven't already?!

Thu, Feb. 16th, 2006 11:02 am (UTC)
vinnie_tesla

It could be worse. Someone could use my egg cell idea.

Thu, Feb. 16th, 2006 09:13 pm (UTC)
mycrust

Ha. Though I wonder how much of that fetish has to do with baby-making per se and how much to do with the idea that getting a woman pregnant could be seen as a form of humiliation.

I admit that the former has more comic potential.

At this point I had written a satitic, lavishly faux-erotic description of a sperm cell stuck to the zona pellucida of the ova, slowly digesting its way through to the membrane of the egg itself. I deleted it cause it got a little out of hand.

Wed, Feb. 15th, 2006 08:04 pm (UTC)
anotherjen: FYI

A chest size of 44 isn't actually that big. I'm a 42-D. Not really close to linebacker.

Thu, Feb. 16th, 2006 11:03 am (UTC)
vinnie_tesla: Re: FYI

Aargh! That's what I get for not running the piece by a Real Live Woman before posting. How embarassing!

Thu, Feb. 16th, 2006 11:10 am (UTC)
anotherjen: Re: FYI

Well, to be fair, in the mass media culture, I am gigantic. I mean, "extra-large" clothing is too small for me. (I'm a 1X.)

Thu, Feb. 16th, 2006 11:36 am (UTC)
gary_jordan: Re: FYI

In Vinnie's defense, a woman described as "44DD, 24, 36" and 5'4" might resemble a miniature linebacker in full padding. The writers who feel obliged to mention bra size in their initial descriptions generally seem to have grown up ogling their sisters' Barbie dolls.

Thu, Feb. 16th, 2006 11:38 am (UTC)
gary_jordan: If you jerk off a lot, does it make your hand unable to squeeze your dick?

Well, actually, yes!

Carpal Tunnel a.k.a. Repetative Motion Syndrome is so debillitating. (You did say, "a lot".)

Thu, Feb. 16th, 2006 11:41 am (UTC)
vinnie_tesla: Re: If you jerk off a lot, does it make your hand unable to squeeze your dick?

I considered mentioning that loophole, but since I've beeen trying dilligently to bring RSI on that way for over two decades, it didn't strike me as terribly likely.

Thu, Feb. 16th, 2006 12:06 pm (UTC)
gary_jordan: Re: If you jerk off a lot, does it make your hand unable to squeeze your dick?

Yeah, well, I'm 54 going on 55. Maybe I've had more practice? And possibly a lot more repetition?

Sat, Feb. 18th, 2006 07:22 pm (UTC)
newsfuck

Vinnie, I love you.

Though I continually fear the like-minded intrusion of botanists and biologists into the realm of tentacle sex; I do not want to know how unlikely it is for tentacles, whether flesh or flora, to do what needs to be done. In fact the pseudo-science that ardent tentacle-sex authors pepper their prose with make the end result all the more delightful.

(But then I love gleefully retarded sci-fi with my porn; I think Spoonbender's piece about alien ships shielded by technology that ran on pussy juice was one of the silliest, hottest, and most enjoyable asstr reads I've ever come across. Wish I could remember what it was called...)

Sat, Feb. 18th, 2006 10:24 pm (UTC)
vinnie_tesla

You know, I actually do know a couple biologists who might have a thing or two to say on that....let me see if I can pique their interests...

I do actually recall the Spoonbender piece you're speaking of. IIRC, it didn't grab me particularly, but that trope of the bank of girls impersonally pleasured certainly has its power over me. In particular, Brian Tarsis and Michael Manning's interpretations of it (in comics) had a big impact on the Tesla fantasy image library.

Tue, Feb. 21st, 2006 03:50 pm (UTC)
gardendoor

Bout bloody time someone spelled it out! Every time I read one of those stories where nipples are suddenly an inch long and twitching of their own accord, I wince...

Tue, Feb. 21st, 2006 03:50 pm (UTC)
callherblondie

This is so great. Talk about the epitome of a public service post. Thanks for writing it!

Tue, Feb. 21st, 2006 03:53 pm (UTC)
enismirdal

Your post WINS! Thank you. Especially the nipples bit. *bookmarks post for future reference when needing to refer people here*

Tue, Feb. 21st, 2006 04:48 pm (UTC)
heartofslash

Instructions on how to measure for a bra. That should clear up any misconceptions about bra size. Just keep in mind that if you're interested in the actual size of the breasts (as in "more than a handful...") it's the letter that counts.

Tue, Feb. 21st, 2006 04:49 pm (UTC)
voyeurkind

Funny, this is just the reason I tend not not to put too many technical details into my stories.

Thanks for the useful article.

Tue, Feb. 21st, 2006 06:26 pm (UTC)
vanillafluffy

Unless you have an actual office supply fetish (not that there 's anything wrong with that if you do), could you please avoid the 'pencil erasers' analogy?

LOL! Thank you. If mine ever turned that shade of pink I'd RUN to the doctor---hopefully that wouldn't exacerbate the problem....


Tue, Feb. 21st, 2006 06:33 pm (UTC)
ciarda_rois

Thank you so much. I have seen a fic with that and I cringed. Spread the word! Cervix banging is not sexy!

Wed, Jan. 24th, 2007 06:55 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): The Cervix:

I'm not really anonymous, I'm cmsix, and I'm too lazy to register. I went throught hours of that yesterday trying to get a trial version of Office 2007 and the link was broke. Anyway.

I'm not long enough for original research, but it seems to me that anyone who is wouldn't be able to tell the difference even if they could penetrate the cervix. And, I feel like it is entirely possible for them to feel soemthing that they think is a penertarion of the cervix, or something. I am slightly familiar with not being able to know exactly what my penis is bumping up against in the dark and not being able to determine what it is touching by any tactile clues it seems it should give me, but doesn't really.

So, I'm inclined to think that one of the longer generation might be convinced he had penetrated a cervix, especially if he didn't know it was practically impossible to start with.

Now, if the work is being written in first person, don't you think it would be perfectly acceptable and even expected that the protagonist would expose his ignorance?

Since I don't consider first person to automatically involve an omniscient view, I think it is acceptable for the protagonist to believe, and mention, that he had penetrated a cervix wiht his organ grinder, in fact I think it is to be expected.

It seems to me that the controversy over this particular point fails to take into account that the protagonist are often not the brightest bulbs on the tree and that can't be bothered with facts when they know what they felt or when they report what they imagined happening as fact on the ground.

What say you, vinnie tesla

Wed, Jan. 24th, 2007 07:06 pm (UTC)
vinnie_tesla: Re: The Cervix:

I think 'organ grinder' would be a better euphemism for the vagina than the penis. That's what I think.

Can I imagine a thought-out, well-written story wherein the ill-informed narrator thinks,erroneously, that he has penetrated his partner's cervix? Sure. If you see such a story, please let me know.

Also: Welcome! Cool to see you here, Chess.

Wed, Jan. 24th, 2007 07:29 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: The Cervix:

If you left "well" out of that question on purpose and will accept a "Golden Clitoride" co-winner as suitable qualification of well-written, I can. If your qualification for well-written comes via a panel of former drips under pressure, I'm not sure, but I will run "NanoVirus" up the flagpole to see if you salute.

Penetration of the cervix, or at least the protagonist's imagined penetration of the cervix plays a part in the sex and it is also a major part of the plot.

cmsix

Wed, Apr. 4th, 2007 12:23 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: The Cervix:

Hi, I'm Kinky Bastard.

That's a good point. And should be mentioned on the fact finding sites for authors. Maybe I'll pull stuff into a manual af some sort, but I won't promise.

Also, despite good education, many guys think the dick is muscle though that word isn't used much in English; though I believe meat is. That is, you can in good faith expect an A.I. doctorate to think so.

A lesser know fact, maybe, is that there are girls/women that have no idea how bra sizes actually measure, and think that 38C is bigger than 35C. I met one online, not too long ago.

One other point, that rarely comes up, when discussing technicalites, is the actual length of the vagina. Common number here, at least among the white population, is 8cm that I believe can stretch (I have no idea what that's in in). Asian women tend to have shorter vaginas and negros longer - this is largely the explanation for the dick size difference. There is such a thing as a "too long dick" and once hurt, women tend to avoid them. Evolution has taken care of the rest.

Kinky Bastard

Wed, Apr. 4th, 2007 01:59 pm (UTC)
vinnie_tesla: Re: The Cervix:

I'm not sure if you're responding to cmsix's comment, or the original post. Said post is in fact linked from the ASSTR FAQs page since I nudged Denny to nudge Rey Del Sexo to add it. I also sent the URL to Lazeez, who doesn't seem to have seen fit to do anything with it.

A 38C bra is a bigger article of clothing than a 35C; it's just got the same cup size.

One more linguistic note--'negro' is considered dated and slightly offensive in American English these days. 'Africans' would probably have been the best word choice in this case. 'Blacks' is also okay. Please, for God's sake, whatever you do, do not learn how to talk about race in America by reading ASSTR. That would be a bad, bad thing.

Wed, Apr. 4th, 2007 03:38 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: The Cervix:

I'm replying to both.

Well, I meant the bra thingy only as an example, maybe a poor one, but you'll have to live with it.

Now, on Political Correctness: I don't give a flying fuck what's politically correct, and given a choice, I prefer not to be. If I manage to offend someone with my previous post, that's unfortunate and not meant to be.

On the other hand, "blacks" get to call themseles "niggers" so why can't I get to choose what word I want to? When a word is spoken, it's the tone of voice and context that determines whether it's offending or not. This is lost in text so political correctness is most sensitive in written works. People try to lessen the offensive tone by changing the words, but in my opinion, that's a failure.

That's all I wont to say on PC and offensive words. This isn't the place to discuss them.

Again, I'm not here to insult anyone.

K.B.

Wed, Apr. 4th, 2007 04:40 pm (UTC)
vinnie_tesla: Word choice and Political Correctness

That you are ignorant of the nuances of race in America is certainly not your fault.

You are being arrogant about that ignorance here, and that is your fault.

I'm glad you don't want to insult any one. A good start on doing that is to not use insults. If you call me a kike, I will be insulted. If you call a black person a nigger, she will be insulted. You can call that political correctness if you like. I call it common courtesy.

Tue, Jul. 24th, 2007 06:06 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: The Cervix:

I think I would be more likely to accept your explanation of not wanting to insult anyone, if you had used Caucasian and Mongoloid for whites and Asians respectfully. You only used the race categorization for blacks i.e. Negroes.
I must say I find the term African-American as imprecise, as that would technically include the Arabs and Berbers of North Africa. The same goes double for Asians. This term generally excludes South Asians (i.e. Indian. Pakistan, Bangladesh), definitely West Asians (i.e. Turkey, Iran, Afghanistan) sometimes South-east Asians (Thailand, Malaysia, Indonesia) and really means Eastern Asians. The language on race is hard, because we are one species with many admixtures. It is made more subjective by using geographical terms to define it. Broad categories which we all recognize get harder to define with particular individuals. Some deny its existence, which makes a mockery of the term racism and the attendant discrimination. It is an imprecise, but it does exist.
I'm not saying you are more prejudiced that most people, but we all have unconscious prejudices, sometimes only because of what has been in common usage around us. It is there whether we want to acknowledge it or not.

Mon, Nov. 19th, 2007 10:06 am (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: The Cervix:

There are plenty of caucasian Africans, and "Afro-whatever" summarily ignores all the (sometimes very) dark-skinned people of India in particular, and the South Pacific in general. My favorite euphemism is "Melanistic" (vs. "Amelanistic" for the melanin-challenged types). Unfortunately, these are not widely-used (or understood) words...

Of course, making a vaginal-size generalization about melanistic people probably misses the mark entirely - I know a very dark-skinned Indian (as opposed to "Native American") woman who does not have a particularly large interior. The fact that she is under four feet tall probably has a lot to do with it.

Race has been, and still is, a "hot-button" issue for many people. Centuries of racial discrimination tends to do that. Writers should probably try to steer away from these areas, unless they are deliberately reaching for some sort of shock-value (in which case, they probably use the most-offensive and degrading slang terms they can think of). Even the "good" racial terms, such as "Caucasian", are misleading. The link between most amelanistic people and the Caucus Mountains of Western Asia is pretty tenuous... (And, for you neo-nazi types, "Aryan" properly refers to the major clan/tribe/race from India that lost the war described in the Bhagavad-Gita, and were driven out of the Indus valley - and eventually off the continent entirely. Their purest lineal descendants are the Romani "Gypsies" [another derogatory racial term, I'm afraid].)

I guess I'd have to say that, in this particular case, the writer was making a *technical* point, not a prejudicial one. If one would say that a Caucasian has such-and-such characteristics, then the terms Negroid, Asiatic, and Aleutian are probably the *only* non-prejudicial corresponding terms that can be used. Otherwise, you must either use an explicitly derogatory racial slang, or draw attention to the ignored elephant in the room by dancing around the obvious technical term for the "sensitive" race(s). Essentially, highlighting the issues by the contorted imbalance of the language employed. In non-technical discussions (say, in an ASSTR story-submission), it's best to go with contemporary usage and commonly-used and relatively-inoffensive words (i.e. "Afro-American" is a fine term for "Generic Melanistic inhabitant of the United States"), even if they are technically inaccurate, as you admonished.

I don't have good solution for balancing popular social sensitivities against the requirements of precise terminology in a technical discussion. I'd be delighted to learn of one...

Thu, Dec. 27th, 2007 11:15 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: The Cervix:

FancyNancy again:

Maybe I'm too PC or too sensitive, but my descriptions rarely use concrete labels like "White" "Black" or "Oriental". Personally, I think it comes from great advice from my creative writing professor -- show, don't tell.

"Her mocha skin was beaded with sweat..."
"The sun glinted off the ebony skin of his chest...."
"The olive skin puckered in goosebumps at the touch of my tongue..."
Yada, yada. You get the idea.

Then again, I tend to think of people of a different ethnic background than mine to be exotic and think of myself as a little too vanilla. I guess that's why my SO is...well...not vanilla.

Sat, Apr. 18th, 2009 07:31 pm (UTC)
taimt: Re: The Cervix:

Great work on the guide, very useful. Ever think of creating a series on such things? There's a plethora of "misconceptions" out there on not just the female anatomy but also the male. You could even do one on the psychology of both genders and the misconceptions involved there.

However...

I would like to go back to the "racial" issue once more because I surprisingly have a lot to say on the subject.

I suggest that racism only truly exists anymore because the 'race industry', that is, the people who profit from declaring racism or organizing racial events, would no longer have a job if racism did not exist.

You see, in my personal experience, people call each other things like "Nigger" and "Kike" all the time.

And all most people will tell you is that their definitions are "deragatory word towards (insert group here)". But really, do any of us in this day and age know WHY the words are deragatory?

Why is it more insulting to call a black person a "nigger" than a "stupid asshole son of a bitch"?

I'll tell you why. Hundreds of years of entrenched dogma and the willingness of people to go along with the old "well, THEY find its insulting, so it it is insulting".

People in this day and age frequently forget about "freedom of speech". You know, to say whatever you want. People also forget that you cannot be offended unless you are LOOKING to be offended.

I'm white and I don't mind the racial slurs against me. I welcome them. I'll respond to "whitey" or "cracker" or any number of other slurs. They don't offend me because I do not let OTHERS control how I feel. Why should I let others determine how I feel? The minute you give someone that kind of power, you are subjugated for life.

Not to mention, a lot of these words are no longer racially charged. I've seen kids, even teenagers calling each other "kikes". Even if they don't belong to that group. I've seen white kids call each other "nigger" before. Such things are INCREDIBLY common and lead me to believe that the only reason something is racist anymore, is because the people making money off of it, want it to be racist.

Don't believe me?

Try to start up "The United Caucasian College Fund". Watch the protesters line up. But, somehow, having "The United Negro College Fund" isn't racist in the least. You can find this double-standard EVERYWHERE. It's not limited to just one race, creed, nationality, or even gender either.

And you also can't accuse certain miniorities of being racist. Accuse a black guy of being racist? Why, you can't do that! They used to be slaves, so they're ENTITLED to be racist!

Even if you go on Dictionary.com and look up the word "nigger", there's no real reason for anyone to be offended by it. The definitions include "someone regarded as inferior of the black race" and "a black person".

People treat each other as inferiors all the time. We call each other "stupid" and "dumbass" and "slut" and "asshole" and any number of things. So why on earth are "racial slurs" any worse than a standard insult?

The truth is. They're not. People just want them to be because there's a lot of money in it.

And honestly, if you were able to control what people could and could not say, wouldn't you like to do it as well? Declaring "racism" for every word out there is just one more way of reducing your liberties and reminding you that they can fuck with you any time they want. You know, as long as you put up with it.

To quote George Carlin.

Mon, Nov. 19th, 2007 10:12 am (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: The Cervix:

BTW - I am not the same "Anonymous" as the "first" one in this particular thread...I'm just too lazy to register (much like the first poster).

- Anne O'Neimaus -

Sat, Jan. 23rd, 2010 06:34 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: The Cervix:

I hate to bust your bubble, but the same cup size (e.g., a "C") across band sizes (e.g., 32, 34, 36, etc.) usually does not contain the same volume. Please google sister sizes for more information. An example of sister sizes would be a 32C and a 34B.

Also, for any given size, there will be variations in fit (actual band size and cup volume) across different brands and styles of bras.

All US band sizes are even numbers. The closest one could get to a "35", should that actually be necessary, would be either a 34+ or a 34-1/2.

I agree with you. “Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet.” ~ African proverb.

Zine

Thu, Dec. 27th, 2007 10:56 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: The Cervix:

I'm FancyNancy. My significant other sells plus-sized lingerie on eBay. I thought I knew how bra sizing worked until she explained it to me. After see the questions and complaints she gets constantly, I'm convinced seventy-five percent of American women don't know how to measure themselves for a bra! With men, it comes dangerously close to one-hundred percent.

Just as an interesting side bar; I was surprised at the number of her regular customers who are men, buying for themselves.

Sat, Jan. 23rd, 2010 07:11 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: The Cervix:

When a guy feels, mistakenly, that he's penetrated a woman's cervix, it's most probably because he's managed to wedge his glans between the cervix and one of the fornix vaginae, the true end of the vagina. This is not a bad thing (except that many women's cervices are too sensitive for it), because about half of the vagina's nerve endings reside in or near the fornix; most notably the AFE zone (A-spot) near the anterior fornix, and the PFE zone (cul-de-sac, deep spot) near the posterior fornix.

Zine

Thu, May. 10th, 2007 02:54 am (UTC)
(Anonymous)

Thank You.....

A Guy

Sat, Aug. 4th, 2007 01:10 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Your advisory for authors

Hey,

Thanks for this info. I'm not sure if my thinking is right that you may have 'pulled a boner' here, so I'll simply throw it out to you as a comment. I could be totally wrong, but I was under the impression that the word cum or cumming was an evolution of come. Thus I came and not cummed. Further, I believe that the term was probably created because the that the liquid (sperm/ejaculate) 'came' out of the person.

If that thinking is right, then your instruction on 'Female Ejaculation' might be faulty when you state that 'most women who can ejaculate can also come without ejaculating, and some can ejaculate without coming' because the two terms mean the same, no?

It's not necessary for you to respond here. I'm not looking for an argument/discussion. Only looking to help. If I'm wrong, sobeit.

BTW, you stated you checked the spelling for areole, and I'm sure you did. I'm guessing that you also checked the meaning. Still, I'm looking at Merriam Webster's Collegiate Dictionary 10th Edition and finding the following:

areole - a small pit or cavity.
areola - a colored ring (as about the nipple)

And even though I've looked it up a hundred times and know it should be areola, my brain is such a sieve that in most of my stories, my girls have aureole :)


Regards

Thu, Dec. 27th, 2007 11:26 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: Your advisory for authors

I don't know about that. Maybe I'm straining at a gnat here, but whenever I read that a person “comes” (or cums, whatever), I assume they’re having an orgasm. Male orgasms and ejaculation are almost always simultaneous. When I come, I don't usually ejaculate. My SO almost always ejaculates when she comes, but she never ejaculates when she doesn’t come.

Wed, Apr. 2nd, 2008 04:33 am (UTC)
vinnie_tesla: Re: Your advisory for authors

I agree with your etymology, but not your logic. "Come" became a synonym for orgasm because, in men, ejaculation and orgasm are so strongly correlated*.

Historically, Western culture has considered female sexual pleasure irrelevant or even aberrant. Consider: we have short single words for blood, sweat, tears, piss, semen (or cum), spit, and milk. We have no word for vaginal lubrication except that awkward circumlocution. I'm not interested in participating in that marginalization. I feel like it's more useful to use the colloquial word 'come' for orgasm than for ejaculation, i.e., what is simliar in men and women, rather than what is dissimilar. Others are free to disagree.

As for aureole--yeah, I fucked up, even after bragging about my diligence.

* Note: Even in men, they are not identical. I have done each without the other.

Wed, Apr. 2nd, 2008 03:56 am (UTC)
(Anonymous): The big one you left out

All of these are, I expect useful both to male writers and to the unfortunate proportion of women who really have no idea what's going on in their bodies. (and I'd never thought to actually observe closely what happened with my nipples when I became aroused...just sort of absorbed the "swollen" thing unconsciously. You're right. :) However, it's a mystery to me how anyone, in writing a list of misconceptions about female sexual anatomy on the part of porn writers and forget to mention the single most widespread and annoying one, in my experience: the fervent belief that the hymen is located somewhere between an inch and half a cock-length up the vagina. It's not; it's around the entrance, between the lips (though it is about an inch, in many women, from the outside of the lips when closed...perhaps the widespread tendency to miscall a vagina a vulva is causing confusion on this point?).

Other than that, the weirdest incidents I've encountered were one in which a female character was complaining about being 5'5" and formerly wearing 149 lbs, and being happy about slimming down to 105 lbs because she "looked hot", and an incident in a cyber roleplay where I indicated that I was slipping my finger into my partner's ass and massaging his prostate, and he indicated that he was doing the same to me. I had to explain to him that girls don't have them. That was weird.

Wed, Apr. 2nd, 2008 04:16 am (UTC)
vinnie_tesla: Re: The big one you left out

An honest answer would be that I tend to skim deflowerment scenes. It's not that I don't get the appeal of innocence, but the particular sealed-for-your-protection angle that treats hymens as a fetish object tends to leave me cold.

I'm tempted to say that, further, stories that dwell on the recessed hymen tend to have so many ludicrousnesses (is that a word?) of characterization and circumstance that the hymen stuff pales by comparison. But honestly, once I start using that consideration, my whole list becomes suspect. And where are we then? Chaos, that's where!

Sat, Jan. 23rd, 2010 07:28 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: The big one you left out

The hymen is usually either somewhere between growing out of the vagina's entrance ring (therefore very nearly flush with the vestibule) and about 1/4-inch further inside the vagina. The average, if I remember correctly, is 1/8-inch inside (e.i., just inside of the entrance ring). I should probably note that not all women were born with hymens, and some ehymens are so thin and narrow as to be almost non-existent.

Zine

Sat, Apr. 18th, 2009 05:23 pm (UTC)
lienne

Eventually I'm sure I'll get tired of browsing your journal archives and leaving cheerful little expressions of gratitude whenever I laugh. In the meantime, thank you for writing this post. It is hilarious.

Fri, Aug. 23rd, 2013 12:57 pm (UTC)
ext_2126884: Thank you

I know that 7½ years after writing this you are probably not looking for any more compliments on it, but after randomly arriving here I feel obligated to leave one. It's a shame that something like this isn't required reading before publishing online erotica, but we can still hope!